Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm

Chapter 288: The Cloudscraper Vine Ascends Again!



Chapter 288: The Cloudscraper Vine Ascends Again!

After planting the initiation pellets and checking on the Mysterious Seed that had just sprouted, Jiang He returned inside his mansion.

Sora was busy in the kitchen, dressed in her maid costume.

A thick aroma of rice was wafting within the mansion.

Boa Hancock came up to Jiang He then and spoke attractively, “Tea, Master.”

She had put on a maid costume like Sora’s, which flawlessly accentuated her prided figure.

Usually, Jiang He would never drink tea since it raised spirits, exciting the brain’s nerves... in short, it reduced drowsiness, so how was that acceptable?

His quality of sleep was poor in the first place, and if he drank tea...

Would he not be sleeping at all?

Still, Jiang He had prepared some fine tea since there would occasionally be guests at his house. After all, he couldn’t keep giving out mineral bottles’ worth of Origin Fluid to his guests, could he?

Those who knew about the Origin Fluid was fine, but those who did not would assume that he was belittling them.

Nonetheless, he had a sip of tea.

Feeling the faint sweetness in his mouth, Jiang He could not help grinning. “This Big Red Robe tea worth over twenty million dollars each kilo is really good.”

Jiang He had asked someone to buy those tea leaves.

Harvested from the mother trees in Mount Wuyi of the Nine Dragons Nest Scenic Zone, those tea leaves were not so expensive initially. However, as the Nine Dragons Nest became shrouded in toxic miasma following the Revival of Qi, and with even divine-tier elites losing themselves after they entered, those tea leaves were now unmatched in worth, with its price rocketing from eight million to over twenty million in just a few years.

Jiang He had a thought then—shouldn’t he find a chance to take a trip to Nine Dragons Nest and move the six mother trees that stood for hundreds of years to his farm?

When he got older, he could then trim the tea trees every day and have a taste of genuine Big Red Robe tea.

Meanwhile, Sora was done cooking after two cups of tea.

By the time Jiang He had his fill and rested briefly, it was already ten.

Heading out to the farm and then plucking the latest batch of Doom Shrooms, Jiang He turned to look at the ten plum trees nearby.

He called them ‘plum trees’ since the tree leaves were remarkably similar. Most importantly, the initiation pellets dangling from it were similar in size to plums as well, each glimmering with a golden hue just like ripe plums.

“Initiation pellet trees...”

Jiang He counted carefully. It turns out that there were a hundred initiation pellets on each tree just as he expected.

He reached out and gently plucked one.

[Ding!]

[+100 Farm points.]

The jingle of a System Notification in his head stirred Jiang He’s spirits immensely.

If one initiation pellet was worth 100 Farm Points and each tree bore 100 pellets, it meant that he would earn 10,000 Farm Points for each tree, not to mention that he had 200 of those pellets to plant it.

“That’s two million Farm Points...”

Utterly motivated, Jiang He planted the remaining 190 initiation pellets after he was done harvesting all ten trees’ worth of initiation pellets.

When that was done, Jiang He went beneath the willow tree and took out one of the initiation pellets, then ate it.

He appeared rather surprised after eating it.

Not only did the pellet resemble plums, but it also tasted deliciously sweet and sour just like actual plums.

And once the initiation pellet was in his stomach, Jiang He circulated his True Qi and began cultivating it.

Around five minutes later, the entire pellet was converted to pure medicinal essence and flowed around within Jiang He’s body.

Be that as it may, after flowing around for quite a while...

Whoosh.

It faded away.

“Eh?”

“What’s going on? Wasn’t the initiation pellet supposed to open my orifices? Why isn’t there any effect after I take it?”

Jiang He frowned, unable to comprehend the situation no matter how much he thought about it, and so took out another initiation pellet for consumption but that was to no effect as well. Not one to believe in jinxes, he therefore ate ten, and finally exclaimed in shock when nothing happened at all. “What... did the Superpower Research Department develop a fake pellet?”

“No way, no way. My planting worked and the Farm Points rewarded me with many points. The initiation pellets are clearly authentic!”

“The Superpower Research Department had also performed clinical trials with human subjects and each martial artist who consumed them succeeded in opening an orifice.”

That was when an idea occurred to Jiang He, but he rather doubted it.

Taking out another initiation pellet and holding it in front of his eyes, data appeared before his vision.

[Initiation Pellet]

[Function: Aids the initiation of human orifices.]

[Warm reminder: Effect of the Initiation Pellet diminishes the more initiated orifices the user possesses.]

“Just as I’ve thought!”

Jiang He sighed with a bitter smile. “It seems that I have plenty of initiated orifices... that said, the System did mention that the imitation pellet only diminishes in effect, not that it wouldn’t have any effect at all... But with nothing happening after eating ten pellets, doesn’t that mean...”

“All my orifices are opened?”

That was about the only possibility.

In fact, even Jiang He had a hard time believing it.

What the heck?

Wasn’t it said that those with more orifices opened were more talented?

So how was he a genius?

Calling out to Dumbo, Trumbo, the Blazing Violet Golden Eaglet, the Golden Eaglet and the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers, Jiang He took out over dozens of initiation pellets and shared it among them, saying, “These are initiation pellets. Try them and see if you are able to clear some orifices.”

The Bottle Gourd Brothers immediately opened their mouths, ready to take the pellets while a red-eyed Dumbo promptly lunged forward and stopped them, shrieking, “No... Don’t eat that!”

At the same time, Trumbo had gone off to the stop the Blazing Violet Golden Eaglet and the Golden Eaglet as well, seemingly understanding something else as well. In fact, its whole body was shuddering as it squealed, “Don’t eat it, don’t eat it...”

“What?”

Jiang He frowned. Had these two gone mad?

Still, come to think of it, both Dumbo and Trumbo appeared a little different now. It was as if their fur had been groomed by specialists. Jiang He asked about, and only then did the cat and dog admit, “We went to a hairdresser back at Jingdu City.”

Jiang He was suspicious.

A hairdresser grooming a cat and a dog?

Most importantly, they had done such a good job?

Dumbo sniggered and said, “Actually, the shop owner had refused and had even smashed apart the golden Yuan Bao we offered him, saying that they work for humans and not animals!”

“And then?”

“And then Trumbo took out its blade and used Blade Qi to write some thingmajig on the floor. The shop owner then shut up immediately.”

Jiang He turned towards Trumbo at that, who was about to start writing again, only for Jiang He to stop him with a look. Scratching its ears with its paw, it said awkwardly, “I was just explaining about equality among all life, but for some reason he suddenly became very scared of us.”

Jiang He was speechless.

How could anyone not be scared when you’ve actually drawn your blade?

Then, he asked both pets as to why they were not letting the others take the initiation pellet.

Hence, Dumbo spoke in grief while wiping a tear, “Master, those medicinal pellets are cooked using our blood... letting them take it feels like they’re eating us.”

Jiang He could not help laughing and assured them then, “It’s fine. I planted the initiation pellets, so they are no longer the original pellets. Moreover, it is just as you’ve said—the imitation pellet is cooked with your blood as a catalyst, so they would at most be drinking your blood. Is it even as serious as you put it?”

Dumbo and Trumbo thought about it for a while and nodded together, since that made sense.

With that, cat, dog, two eaglets and the Seven Bottle Gourd Brothers all ran off to another corner of the farm to cultivate. Meanwhile, Jiang He himself took out his phone and browsed the web to pass his time, waiting for the initiation pellets and the Doom Shroom to ripen.

It was another sleepless night.

Finally, when it was seven in the morning...

Jiang He plucked the last initiation pellet, after having finished harvesting all Doom Shrooms as well.

“Phew~~”

Breathing a long sigh, a faint smile appeared on Jiang He’s face... he was finally done.

His eyes turned away as he opened his System and checked his stats.

[Name: Jiang He]

[Cultivation: Immortal Path—complete Golden Pellet; Martial Arts—divine-tier (divine unity)]

[Ability: Royal Sword, fire]

[Martial Arts Cultivation: Indestructible Diamond (Mastery+), Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms (Mastery+), Blind Princess’s Eight Practices (Third Practice+), Strengthened Nine Yang Technique (Eighth Tier+), Ninefold Thunderblade (Mastery), Dragon-Elephant Prajna (Mastery), Nine Heavenly Stars Body Formula (Third Tier+), Three Thousand Calamities (Second Style+), Ice and Fire Duality Sword Array (Mastery), Twenty-Three Swords (First Style+)]

[Owned Land: 9 Mu]

[Farm Level: 5 (EXP 458000/500000)]

[System Backpack: 24 boxes]

[System Shop: Unlocked]

[Farm Points: 4,250,000]

“How is it only 4.25 million?”

Jiang He frowned as he quietly did his math.

“Two million from the initiation pellets... discounting the cost for nitrogen fertilizers, it would be over a million from the Doom Shrooms... and then there is the premium-grade soul items and the sage weapon, as well as Boa Hancock... hmmm, the numbers are more or less correct.”

Even so... 4.25 million was a little lacking.

It was just short of what he had expected—around 4.5 million. With that, he could reach the third tier of Three Thousand Calamities and improve his cultivation to full-fledged True Child, as well as master the Twenty-Three Swords and learn two more Sword Arrays.

But even as he counted and planned...

Boom!

A dull thundering of Yuan Qi erupted in the farm.

The Cloudscraper Vine, which had been quiet for two days, had suddenly burst out with a raging aura.

Its eighteen tendrils that stretched up to 400 meters long were flailing wildly, all of them shooting up in the air before splitting into thirty-six tendrils, each of them still growing.

“Is the Cloudscraper Vine ascending?”

Jiang He appeared delighted at first, but soon frowned.

He could feel vines of aura and spirit boldly and conspicuously reaching out in the direction of the farm, observing.

Rising up into the air, his spirit stirring to knock off the many energies, he coolly seethed, “Who could be that brave, daring to spy on Jiang He?!”


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